How To Write A Maid of Honor Speech (50 Best Tips)
Are you looking for advice and tips on how to write a Maid of Honor speech for your best friend or sister?
You have come to the right place!
Writing and giving a speech is one of the main Maid of Honor responsibilities so I have put together the ultimate guide to writing a great Maid of Honor toast.
What qualifies PA Unveiled to give these Maid of Honor speech writing tips?
I have personally photographed and helped plan over 500 weddings. That means I have heard over 500 Maid of Honor speeches. I have definitely heard some amazing speeches and I have heard some really bad speeches (really really bad).
We have used those 500 speeches to put together these tips to help you write your toast.
Here is what we cover below:
- Maid of Honor Speech (Do’s and Don’ts)
- Questions to answer before writing your speech
- The best MOH speech outline
- What to include in the Maid of Honor speech
- Things to avoid when giving your speech
- MOH speech frequently asked questions (FAQ)
- Maid of Honor speech examples
- Free printable MOH speech outline template
*All photos in this article were taken by me (Thomas Beaman).
Maid of Honor Speech Do’s and Don’ts (Summary)
For those who are short on time, here is a quick summary of what to do and what not to do when writing your Maid of Honor speech (For the rest of this article, when we say Maid of Honor speech, we are also talking about the Matron of Honor speech):
Do’s For Your MOH Speech
Here are some of the best Maid of Honor speech tips to consider when planning out your speech:
- Keep your speech to 2-5 minutes
- Write your speech 1 month before the wedding day
- Introduce yourself and your relationship to the bride
- Tell a funny story or share a sweet memory of the bride
- Talk about the bride’s partner (groom or bride)
- Say something about they are perfect for each other
- Close with a quote and a toast to the happy couple
- Practice giving your speech out loud multiple times before the big day
- Print your speech out (or put it on note cards)
- Use a large font (18pt) and double-space your text
- Add additional white space (4-5 blank lines) in between thoughts (so it’s easier to find your place in your notes)
- Number your speech pages in case you get them mixed up
- Try to stay sober
- Speak slowly and make eye contact with the bride and other guests.
Don’ts For Your MOH Speech
- Try not to make the speech only about you and the bride (a little bit is fine)
- Don’t write your speech the day before the wedding
- Leave former boyfriends out of the speech
- Stay away from stories that involve alcohol or drugs
- Don’t swear (know your audience)
- Try not to embarrass the bride in front of her family (or her inlaws)
- If possible, don’t read your speech from your phone (hard to read and easy to get lost)
- Don’t write your Maid of Honor speech from start to finish (brainstorm first, then put it all together)
Ask Yourself These Questions Before Writing Your Maid of Honor Speech
One of the best ways to write the perfect Maid of Honor speech is to prepare ahead of time and get all of your thoughts onto a computer document (bullet points are your best friend) or written out on paper or Post-It notes.
I recommend asking yourself some questions that you can easily answer about the bride.
These do not need to be overly organized and perfectly written. Your goal is to get your thoughts into bullet points to make writing your Maid of Honor speech easier later on.
Here are a few questions to get you started:
How does the bride make your life better?
When are some times that the bride has been there for me?
What are the bride’s best qualities?
What are your favorite stories or memories about the bride?
How does the bride make you laugh?
How has the bride made you a better person?
Why will the bride make a great wife?
Feel free to brainstorm some of your own questions too.
Create Your Maid of Honor Speech Outline
Once you have all of your thoughts written down (or typed up), it’s time to put your speech together.
Here is an outline that I recommend using (detailed info on each section can be found below plus you can download a free Maid of Honor speech template):
- Introduce yourself
- Thank the people who helped put the wedding together (parents of the bride, groom, wedding party, vendors, etc.)
- Tell one great story about the bride
- Give a heartfelt message directly to the bride
- Talk about the groom (or the bride’s partner)
- Talk about the couple
- End your speech with a quote and a toast to the newlyweds
What To Include In Your Maid of Honor Speech
Here are the different sections to include for the perfect Maid of Honor speech:
Introduce Yourself To The Wedding Guests
There are going to be many wedding guests who have no idea who you are (don’t worry, they will all love you after your amazing speech!).
Briefly introduce yourself at the very beginning of your speech and tell everyone what your relationship with the bride is (sisters, best friends, etc.).
*If you need ideas on how to start your Maid of Honor speech, we put together a bunch of great examples here.
Thank Everyone Who Helped Make the Wedding Possible
Briefly thank the people who put the wedding together.
This might be the parents of the bride, the parents of the groom, a combined effort of multiple family members, or the wedding party. Maybe the couple planned the entire wedding by themselves.
Briefly thank them for putting together such a beautiful wedding ceremony and reception.
And thank the guests for coming out to support the happy couple.
Tell A Story About The Bride
This can be a sweet and sentimental story or a funny story. Whatever you think fits the bride best.
Your goal with this story should be to tell the rest of the room why the bride is such an amazing person.
Give A Heartfelt Message Directly To The Bride
This is where you get to tell the bride why she is so important to you. Use your brainstorming notes to make this section perfect.
Talk About The Groom or Bride’s Partner
Switch your attention to the groom or the other bride and say a few words about them as a person. You could tell everyone why this person is so perfect for your best friend or sister.
Tell Guests Why They Make Such A Great Couple
Say a few lines explaining why these two people make such a perfect couple.
You want to make sure to focus some of your speech on both the bride and her partner.
Briefly talk about their love story.
End Your Speech With A Quote and Toast
End your speech with a funny or sweet quote and a wedding toast that fits the couple’s personality.
You can use a quote from this list that we put together, or you can make it more personalized by asking the bride for a few moves that she loves, or a few songs that are meaningful to the couple.
Then you can use a quote from one of those to end your speech.
Don’t forget to have everyone raise their glass to toast the couple at the very end of the speech.
Follow that structure for a great toast!
What To Avoid When Giving Your Maid of Honor Speech
Don’t mention exes
When giving your Maid of Honor speech, don’t bring up
Stay away from drunk stories
Embarrassing stories about college days and drunken nights might make a few of your friends laugh, but they are not something that you should add to your Maid of Honor speech.
Remember, the bride is probably meeting many of her partner’s family members and friends for the first time at the wedding reception. The last thing she wants is to feel embarrassed or ashamed by something that she did in the past.
Save the crazy stories for the bachelorette party.
Keep inside jokes to a minimum
Inside jokes are funny and awesome (to the people who know the details).
Inside jokes are usually confusing to everyone else.
I recommend leaving inside jokes and private stories out of your speech.
Don’t talk about divorce
Stay away from jokes about divorce rates and negative talk about marriage.
Some people might find the jokes funny but many guests will not appreciate them.
There is no reason to make your Maid of Honor speech over the top.
Once again, keep jokes like this between your group of friends at the bachelorette party or bridal shower (even then it’s best to know your audience before saying too much).
Maid of Honor Speech FAQ (Frequently Asked Questions)
Here are a few tips and FAQs about putting together a great MOH speech:
How Long Should a Maid of Honor Speech Be?
You should try to keep your Maid of Honor speech between 2-5 minutes.
The goal is to give an amazing speech and leave them wanting more.
When Should You Start Writing The Maid of Honor Speech?
I recommend starting your Maid of Honor speech about 1 month prior to the wedding day.
Spend the first two weeks brainstorming and getting your thoughts onto paper (or a computer) and getting your speech put together.
Then spend the last 2 weeks practicing your speech and making any little changes needed.
How Do You Start A Maid of Honor Speech?
Start your Maid of Honor speech by introducing yourself and telling everyone what your relationship to the bride is. Then thank whoever helped put the wedding together.
Check out the following article for over 100 ways to start your MOH speech.
What if the Maid of Honor is too shy to give a speech?
If the thought of making a speech makes you a little nervous, know that you are not alone.
There are not many people who love public speaking and there are even fewer people who make their living as a professional speechwriter.
One way to deal with your nerves and tackle the issue head-on is to say it out loud as soon as you get the microphone.
Say something like:
“Hi everyone! Before I start I have to warn you that I am not the best public speaker (There is nothing that scares me more). But there was nothing that was going to keep me from saying a few words at my sister’s wedding (or best friend, cousin, etc.). So if you see me shaking, you know why. Ok, here it goes!”
This breaks the ice and gets people on your side from the start. Everybody will be able to sympathize with you.
If you are absolutely terrified and do not want to give a speech, talk to the bride at least a month before the wedding date and tell her how you feel.
Ask her if there is a family member or another bridesmaid who can give the speech (or maybe you could even do a combined speech with a few of the other bridesmaids).
Is giving a Maid of Honor toast in front of 200 people at the wedding reception seems too overwhelming, you could say a few nice words and well wishes to the happy couple at the rehearsal dinner (not as formal and not as many people)
Does The Maid of Honor Speech Go First? Or After The Best Man?
Typically, Maid of Honor speeches go before the Best Man speech but there are no set rules.
Here is the traditional order of wedding speeches at the wedding reception (you do not have to include any of these toasts that you do not want to include):
- The parents of the bride (or whoever is hosting the wedding)
- Parents of the groom
- Maid of Honor
- Best Man
- The couple
What Do You Say About The Groom In The Maid of Honor Speech?
After saying something heartfelt about the bride, you want to turn your attention toward the groom or the bride’s partner.
If you personally know them, you can just speak from the heart and do the same thing that you did for the bride.
If you do not know the groom very well, you can ask him a few questions during your brainstorming session (or you can ask the bride).
Here are a few questions to consider asking:
- How did he propose
- What does he love most about the bride
- Where did they go on their first date (why this location)
- What is his favorite memory of their relationship
After asking a few questions like this, you will get a good sense of who he is and why is perfect for the bride.
Use that info to complete that part of your speech.
Should you Print Out Your Maid of Honor Speech?
Yes, we recommend printing out your Maid of Honor speech on paper (or writing the speech on note cards). We recommend paper (large bold font, numbered pages, and 4-6 blank lines/spaces in between each section).
If you don’t want to read your entire speech word for word, you can write your main points onto note cards (number them).
We do not recommend reading wedding speeches from your cell phone. The text is small, it’s easier to get lost, and it’s harder to look away to make eye contact with the bride, couple, bridal party, and other guests. Plus if the wedding reception room is dark, you will see a bright glow on your face during your speech.
Maid of Honor Speech Examples
Here is a couple of Maid of Honor speech examples to get those creative juices flowing:
How to start your speech:
Here are a couple of different examples of how to start your speech:
“Good evening everyone! I’m Rebecca, Stacy’s sister and honored Maid of Honor. I want to express our deepest gratitude to our parents for orchestrating this incredible wedding. Thank you, everyone, for joining us to celebrate the love between Stacy and Jacob. Your presence means the world to the happy couple, and we’re thrilled to have you here on this unforgettable day.”
“Hello everyone! I’m Alicia, the Maid of Honor and proud best friend of our stunning bride, Shyla. It’s a pleasure to see so many of you here supporting the love story of Shyla and Dylan. Thank you for being part of their journey.”
Check out the following article for over 100 ways to start the perfect Maid of Honor speech.
How to end your speech:
Here are a couple of different examples of how to end your speech:
“To wrap things up, I’m reminded of a beautiful quote from the movie When Harry Met Sally: “When you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible.” Today, we celebrate the beginning of that journey for Rebecca and Thomas. Their love has shown us the power of two souls who find their perfect match, and we know their future is filled with happiness and adventure. So, let’s raise our glasses and toast to Rebecca and Thomas, may the rest of your lives be as wonderful as the love that brought you here today. Cheers!”
“Ladies and gentlemen, let’s raise a glass to Jen and Justin as they embark on their journey of love and happiness. To quote Audrey Hepburn, “The best thing to hold onto in life is each other.” May their lifetime together be filled with endless laughter, adventure, and unwavering love. Cheers to a beautiful future, and to the newlyweds who inspire us all!”
Check out the following article for over 100 ways to end your Maid of Honor speech perfectly.
For lots more MOH speech examples (with video) check out this awesome article we just put together!
What is the best Maid of Honor speech you have ever heard? Have any tips to share with our readers? Leave a comment at the bottom of this post and let us know.
Download A Free Printable Maid of Honor Speech Outline
Download our free Maid of Honor speech outline template.
The free printable template includes all of the brainstorming questions and speech sections listed in the article above. Use it to put together the best wedding speeches ever!
More Helpful Tips For Maid of Honor Speeches
Here are a few more articles that we have put together about writing the perfect Maid of Honor toast:
- How to start your Maid of Honor wedding speech (over 100 ideas)
- The perfect way to end your Maid of Honor wedding speech (over 100 ideas)
- Examples of the perfect Maid of Honor wedding speeches (includes videos of real wedding toast samples)
- Perfect quotes to use in your Maid of Honor speech
Additional Wedding Planning Tips and Resources
Here are a few more articles that you might find helpful during the wedding planning process:
- The most important Maid of Honor duties and responsibilities
- The ultimate Maid of Honor printable planner
- Will you be my bridesmaid (or Maid of Honor) proposal ideas
- Pros and cons of having two Maids of Honor
- The best Maid of Honor planners, bridal shower game cards, and bachelorette party game cards
